Aug 13, 2017

Maybe I am not good enough for him. It hurts me when they see a message but don't reply. Yes we know he maybe busy. It still doesn't hurt any less. I have kept my feelings trapt away. That way I can help him more. But sometimes I want to talk about my feelings. But I don't. I won't.
I honestly feel like at times I should just numb myself. Ignore what I feel more. I am depressed a lot. I keep thinking just one little cut. It could help. But I won't do that. I made a promise not to. Instead I just lay there and cry. I know I am weak. Fuck I know it. I only cry when I am alone. That way its out. So no one else sees it.