Sep 12, 2017

I am going back to how I was before. I used to not care, barely eat, sleep a lot, never talk and if I did it was one or two words.
I dressed up to go to his house today. It was stupid. I was trying to feel pretty. I know I am not.
I still think no one should care about me. Im not worth it. Fuck I fell for him when I knew he wasn't ready to be with anyone. It will probably take years for him and once he is he will find someone else.
I hate myself so much. I want to hurt myself. But I can't.  I can't hurt him. I have been having nightmares. I don't tell him tho. He doesn't need to worry about me.