my unique life

So I am on the 2nd week of school. I love it. It is so easy. I am not single anymore either. I am dating someone. But the only person who knows who it is is my Best friend cici. Lisa is also my best friend but I don't need her to yell at me or making me mad. Lately some things Lisa says have either made me mad or depressed. I won't tell her either. I can handle it. Right now I just turned in a paper early for class, so I am listening to music. I have downloaded a lot of country. but shhhh don't tell mom. Anyway, I want to know how ya'll are doing. So if you would like to comment down below how you day has been going. Until next time lovelies -Jasmin

So I am single again. For valentines day I took a girl on a picnic. I gave her a handmade letter with a sucky poem, two flowers, a candy rose, a teddy bear, box of chocolates, and an artwork. We haven't talked much since then, but the day of she played the piano beautifully. I am finally in another college, I transferred from Dona ana community college to Grand Canyon University online. It is much easier. I don't have any breaks, I have class on Saturday and Sunday. And I only have one class every 7/8 weeks. Lastly, I am so stressed out about money. My check won't be here until 30-45 days which will be near the end of March. So I won't be able to get me something for my birthday like I planned. My sister's birthday is the 28th of this month, she is turning 17. I won't be able to get her a present, nor my mother. I stress myself out so much, that I sleep a lot. It's only I can cope. Some people get money so easily, yet my family and I have been struggli...

So happy it is almost 2017. He broke up with me. He wants to stay with her. I am okay. I did something big to me. I cut my hair short. Anyway so I am still listening to songs to choose which ones i want to do covers on. We got a cat 2 years old, so that princess wasn't lonely. bad idea the cat attacked everyone. got me the worse. My mind, thinks multiple things a minute which is good. I don't want to think about him. I am happy for him that he decided to follow his heart even if that means mine got broken. I really want to find someone who will be with me forever but i guess its not my time to find someone. I will be fine though. I am gonna put myself into my hobbys. Makeing more art, making covers of songs, etc. Thanks for reading, have a nice day/night.

So I came up with an idea, do to covers of songs. It is a way for me to get over my stage fright. Plus, there are some that you can make it into a duet and I wanna do some with my boyfriend. He is the one who gave me inspirations to do it.  He is finally moving here in January, I wish it was sooner but it is better than nothing. I am listening to 170 artist's and choosing the songs I like. Wish me luck.

My sister just told me she hopes I die. I mean honestly, it seems like a good idea. I lost the person I love, I am barely talking to people. Or maybe I can just start cutting myself. I need someone to talk to. He is the only one who I can trust and tell everything to. But I lost him so I can't anymore. I hate myself, I know I am fat, ugly, worthless. I am everything bad. He made me believe I'm not. I only heard his voice telling me I am perfect, that I am beautiful and I started to believe it. But now that he is gone I am worse. Why can't I find someone to love.

I wanna tell him i cant live without him. I want to hug him. I want to cry. But if he is happy with his girl. Then i wont. His happiness is what i care for a lot. I cant hurt him. But i dont want to talk to him yet i do at the same time. Why does love have to be so complicated? Can I just go back into my shell and sleep a lot? That way i can stop feeling. I love him so much but i have to let him go.

The relationship ended on what was suppose to originally be the 3rd month anniversary. I am happy that he followed his heart, even though that means mine is broken. I do hope he and his girl are happy for the rest of their life together. Yes, I am hurt. But his happiness is all that I want. Yes, I may cry for a little but I can deal with it. I am strong. I have done it before. It seems everytime that someone breaks up with me they find the person they want to be with forever. Why can't I find someone I want to be with forever? But I will deal with it. I am me and I can handle another heartbreak. He and I are just gonna be friends. It's for the best. I hope though I can find someone I want to spend the rest of my life with. Anyway Until Next Time. Have a great day/night.