Is it sad...

Is it sad that I blocked my emotion? That way I don't break down and cry. So I can focus on making sure everyone else is happy.
Is it sad that I still love him? I don't think I will ever stop loving him, though I know I should.
Is it sad that I just wanna lay in bed and sleep? To forget everything? To make it where my heart stops feeling.
The truth? That is overrated. I start to think what if all the things he told me is a lie. I start to wonder maybe I should become mute. I mean will anyone even care? Will anyone even notice?
My heart? Don't worry about it. I don't have one anymore. It's gone, broken into a million pieces. I can't ever get it back.
My happiness? That is gone too. Now the darkness will take over, So back to the old me. Barely there, just a shadow. Nobody notice's, nobody cares.
I hope he is happy, Now that I am broken and too far to come back. I hope it made him smile with glee by tearing my world apart.